When Mondays Attack

Monday. The beginning of another work. I usually look forward to them, and today was no exception. See, I enjoy the anticipation of what the new week will bring, which new clients will walk in, what new topic I will have the chance to study for a case, etc. The morning at the office usually begins with the following conversation:

Me: Good morning!
Boss: How was your weekend?
Me: (I go on for about two minutes about my weekend, although I know he was just asking to be nice.) How was your weekend?
Boss: It was a weekend. It was long, I wasn't at the office, now it's over.
Me: (Insert witty remark that cleverly leads into a question regarding an ongoing project...)

This happens the same way every week. It has become quite the routine. Today was no different.

But this is where the similarities between this and other Mondays ended. It began with internet troubles. The Boss had given me a very interesting topic to research and had even requested that I discuss my findings in the oh so professional memorandum-of-law format I have begun sneaking into my work. When I started working there, and every time thereafter, the Boss expected my research findings to consist of print-outs of cases with pertinent parts highlighted. I would bring these to him and discuss in person the major points of the cases and their relation to our present case. I did not engage in such casual research out of laziness; I was merely doing the Boss's bidding. But when he was out a few weeks ago, and I had a little time on my hands, I took the opportunity to type out two wonderfully long, law-rich memorandums for two separate research assignments. Apparently he realizes now that something was missing all along... the great divide between Boss and Employee, Lawyer and Non-lawyer, Owner and Worker, King and Plebe... perhaps I'm being hyperbolic. To the point, Boss liked my dissertations and now wants more.

So there I sat in my comfortable chair, about to indulge in a little case law, when I realized the internet was running very slow. Then I realized that slow was poor word choice. What I meant to say was that it was not running at all.

My boyfriend likes to say the internet is not a big truck, but today it was. Today it was a big truck stuck in the mud. So my big project of the day got delayed. Problem One.

Around lunch time, I noticed that my face felt a little flush and that I was perspiring a little. I said to myself, "When I told the Boss to save energy by putting the thermostat on 76, I had no idea it would be so hot." When I tasted salt on my lips, I felt I better do something about the heat before I melted. The Boss was out buying office supplies.

The thermostat had no lights or digital read out on it. This was not good. I was not tall enough to reach the fan in my part of the office. So I sat there in the heat, which was all the more oppressing once I knew the a/c was somehow broken.

The Boss arrived sometime after I had escaped to my apartment for lunch and returned to the sweltering cinder block that was our office today. I thought my day was turning around when I say him step through the door with a big box... a big box holding a brand new all-in-one printer! Finally, I could toss out my little squeaker printer from 199__! Finally, I would be able to scan documents in my own area and send faxes straight from the computer!

While the Boss conducted an afternoon meeting, I set up the beautiful new printer. It took me ten minutes to realize that the computer it was hooked up to didn't even know it existed. I felt bad for the printer... I remember being in its position once, wanting someone/thing that didn't even know I was alive. Sigh. No matter what technological prowess I used, no matter which trick I tried or how many times I reloaded the drivers, the computer insisted on ignoring my beautiful new printer! My solution would be to get a new computer, but someone I feel the Boss might disagree.

The office I left this afternoon was a hot mess. No A/C, a dysfunctional computer-printer relationship, and spotty internet. I only hope Tuesday will let up on me a bit.